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" Anorexia is not collar bones. It is the smell rotting of flesh as you dismantle your body bit by bit. Anorexia is not a thigh gap, it is your knees so weak they shake as you fall to the ground. Anorexia is not self control. It is the feeling of utter hopelessness as your life tornados into a blizzard of nothingness. Anorexia is not fashionable. It is your mother’s sobbing eyes as she sees her child dying. Anorexia is not 80 pounds. It is the weight of a thousand pulsing suns on your shoulders. A thick black cloud in your mind, and rules spelled out like chains pulling you towards the ground. No matter what measure of gravity that you have in this earth, it still hurts, it’s still real, and you still deserve to reach out and get help. "
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" My darling, you are allowed to fail without being a failure. You are allowed to make mistakes without becoming one. More opportunities will present themselves, you will find hope again. "
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"

Mental illness is not like make up. You cannot apply it in the morning then remove at home where there is no one around. It will not make people love you more. You cannot put on a coat of depression, dust on anxiety, draw on your self injuries and spray your bulimia. It is not something so people think you are beautiful, Mental illness is not beautiful.

Mental illness is a disease to the brain. It makes you sick, the voices that you hear are no one else’s but your own. You get tired of things that you once loved, you get tired of people you once loved. Sometimes, you get so scared to go outside that you’d rather die inside your room. You hate yourself and hate yourself, you have no other way to express it but to draw blood. You remember that there are 49 calories in an apple but forget how to smile.
It is not like make up. You are not playing ‘Mommy’ or ‘Grown Ups’ It will not make you any more or less beautiful. So please stop pretending and romanticising mental illness.

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